February 9, 2015
Sorority Recruitment is like, such high stakes. Not only do you have to relate to freshman, you also have to figure out which ones are going to fuck up your sorority’s reputation and/or gain 20 pounds in the next 3 years. Worst, questions like “What’s your major?” don’t always reveal to you whether or not she’s an annoying drunk. Even on pref night when the conversations get deep, (“Omg, no way! I love backpacking through Europe too! Have you ever stayed at the Four Seasons in London? It’s my favorite hostel!”) you can still find yourself wondering who is this chick, really?
Luckily for you, 37 Questions That Will Make You Fall in Love inspired us to come up with a whole new set of question purely designed to seek out the best betches in rush. Maybe show it to your recruitment chair and see how willing she would be to change the policy on not talking about boys, brands, or booze for next year. Like what’re we supposed to talk about then? Drugs?
1. Can you decipher the difference between a scream and a chant?
2. Have you owned anything made by Coach in the last six years?
3. How would you describe your Instagram presence?
4. How capable do you feel at drinking five nights a week while maintaining at least a 3.0 GPA?
5. How long can you hold a fake smile for?
6. Bottom or top bunk?
7. Would you ever be attracted to someone who looks like my ex boyfriend? What about my little’s ex boyfriend?
8. How accepting are you of douchebags?
9. Do your parents tend to donate money to philanthropies? Grandparents? Anyone else who we should know about?
10. Where do you see yourself this spring break?
11. Would you please disclose to me if you have any weird younger sisters that we’d have to let in in the future?
12. How literal do you take themed parties?
13. Are you comfortable with talking shit about crafting but then spending hours…crafting?
14. What do you think the most meaningful line in Mean Girls is?
15. How likely are you to use condoms and help prevent us from becoming the herpes sisterhood?
16. Would you describe yourself as having a fast metabolism?
17. Fuck, Kill, Marry: Vodka, Tequila, Gin.
18. Are you a typical winner, loser, or midfielder in a game of “Never Have I Ever”?
19. Do you like eating cereal when you’re drunk?
20. Would you mind showing me a photo of what you look like without makeup on?
21. How likely are you to participate in a choreographed dance routine?
22. Do you understand the difference between dressing like a slut and being a slut?
23. Would you be willing to cry tears of joy for our bid day video?
24. Have you ever, or do you currently, own a PC?
25. Describe to me what you’re looking for in a perfect date dash date.
26. Are you going to study abroad in Florence or in Barcelona?
27. What’s your shit talking style?
28. Do you have an Adderall prescription?
29. Which do you do first: blackout, pass out or vomit?
30. Would you be willing to not wear your letters on days that you look like absolute shit?
31. What’s the best decision you’ve made blacked out and what is the worst?
32. Do you align more with a JAP or WASP identity?
33. In a hypothetical situation that you owned a Taylor Swift CD and I wanted a copy, would you be able to burn it for me and never, ever, speak to anyone about the exchange?
34. Describe to me your relationship with your eskimo sisters.
35. Do you think you’re really pretty?
36. How often did you supply your parents’ alcohol to your high school bestie group?
37. How skilled are you at blow…ing glitter?