4 Things You Should Probably Stop Doing After College

By Betch Ivy Carter

Post-grad depression is a very real thing. Sure, you can avoid your problems by running away to Europe after graduation and spending a month blacking out while convincing your parents your getting cultured (and we would highly recommend it). But that will only postpone the inevitable. Eventually, fall will come around and with it the surreal and depressing realization: you're not in college anymore. This transition is weird and uncomfortable, which is why ThoughtCatalog can still get away with posting 70 articles a week about adapting to life in your early twenties. Like, we get it. We're drunk toddlers masquerading as adults. Thanks for the groundbreaking insight.

But suddenly you live at home again and your parents don't understand why you drink a bottle of wine a night and sleep until noon everyday, which becomes a serious problem because four years of hard conditioning has taught you to live this way. The sad truth is, some things will have to change. This isn't to say you stop having fun. Despite what it may feel like sometimes, twenty-two is not old. Twenty-three is also not old, but holy shit it will feel like it. Good luck after that, I haven't gotten there yet.

Partying after college just means you (technically) should know how to handle your shit and can go to nicer bars. It also means it's time to drop some of your less classy habits. Here's a few that you probably needed to stop, like, yesterday.

Blacking out on Tuesdays

Or really any other weekday (barring special occasions of course). Being hungover at work the day after the Super Bowl? Kosher. Being hungover on a Wednesday morning because you started with a casual happy hour and ended the night closing down a karaoke bar at 2 AM? Questionable.

Making out with strangers in bars

This was embarrassing in college, and the levels of regret only increase ten-fold afterwards. At school, a sloppy public MO at worst resulted in some embarrassing pictures the next day. Now, you run the risk of your boss and coworkers seeing you very publicly stick your tongue down some random guys throat. Also, your friends will still take pictures because people are assholes no matter how old they are.

Being grossly hungover in public

Rolling out of bed, throwing your hair in a bun, and going to coffee in norts, Uggs, and last year's formal sweatshirt is no big deal in a college town. In the real world, reeking of alcohol in public with last nights makeup smudged halfway down your face is frowned upon. If you were to stroll into your neighborhood Starbucks around 11:30 on a Saturday morning looking like an off-duty hooker from Law & Order: SVU, mothers will shield their children from you and your barista will bring it up for weeks to come (not a personal experience or anything).

Buying $10 vodka

There's a big difference between an 18-year-old hangover and a 22-year-old one. Love yourself.

FULL DISCLOSURE I have done every single one of these things in the past month. You know what they say: those who can, do, and those who can't write preachy articles about it. Learn from my mistakes.





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