Betch of the Week: Heidi Klum

By The Betches

In honor of her saying auf wiedersen to Scarface Seal, we've decided to grant the honor of Betch of the Week to the one and only Heidi Klum. Their breakup may signal the end of Heidi-Seal spottings for Aspen-goers, but Heidi will always be immortalized for us. Even if she's named after a 5 year old nice girl with ringlets.

While we may love that Heidi was born #3 abroad, the fact that she's German means she's scary as fuck. But though we'd normally be freaked out by that, the fact that she's our longstanding fav Vic Secret angel makes up for her funny accent.

Betches worldwide might know Heidi as an angel, but a shady fact is that she's been told she couldn't be a runway model because her boobs are too big (aw, we feel so bad for her). We all know how that story ended. Just as an extra 'fuck you' to those haters she became the host of Project RUNWAY, where she gets to #1 talk shit about aspiring models to their faces. See, it's like, karma.

heidi klumHeidi, so hot right now, Heidi

Regarding Project Runway she's stated: “I think it's really nice to have a documentary-style show where talented people are actually doing something."


...We couldn't agree more. And while we love Bravo, we can't believe this informational documentary of gifted individuals isn't on the History Channel or at least TLC.

Anyway, we understand if Heids has a hard time with English, which is clear from the fact that her kids' names are just barely pronounceable. We have: Henry Gunther Ademola Dashtu Samuel, Johan Riley Fyodor Taiwo Samuel, Lou Sulola Samuel, and Leni. That last one was adopted if you couldn't tell.

So despite the fact that she's really easy to make fun of, we'll just stop here and admit that we're big fans. In a world where you're either in or you're out, timeless model betch Heidi Klum is perpetually IN. Seal, not so much.


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