November 25, 2011
When it comes to betchiness, sometimes we have to look overseas to see how to do it right. Enter Ja’mie King, the only betch capable of overturning the nice girl image Olivia Newton John slapped on Australian girls' backs when Grease was released.
Ja’mie speaks words of truth that are unparalleled by any other betch. As the self-proclaimed ‘smartest non-Asian in year 11’, Ja’mie knows how to use her student exchange from private to public school in order to manipulate fellow betches, nice girls, teachers, and 12 year old bros.
Ja’mie is normally described as the ‘stunning but atrocious, narcissistic and callous high school girl in Year 11 at Hilford Girls' Grammar School.’ Ugh, she’s like our idol. Since her epic betchiness can only be described through the words of Ja’mie herself, we’ve compiled her view on various betchy topics.
On #1 Talking Shit:
"I've learnt that you've got to be really careful when you bitch about your friends...watch out for your MSN windows, really carefully."
On poor people:
“People always go, "private schools create better citizens." But I would say they create better quality citizens. Studies have shown that students from private schools are more likely to get into uni and end up making a lot more money. While wife beaters and rapists are nearly all public school educated. Sorry, no offense, but it's true.”
"Why would you CHOOSE to live in a townhouse?"
Ja'mie: Why don't you go fuck yourself public school bitch.
Holly: Chill out Ja'mie, you're really embarrassing yourself.
Ja'mie: You know what would be embarrassing? Having your head!
On #5 diets:
“My breasts would have been bigger but I had an eating disorder in year eight so they didn't develop properly.”
“I love your bins, they're so random.”
On nice girls:
Ja'mie: So, who are like, the really hot girls in yr 11? Like, the really popular ones?
Ashley: There's Holly and her friends, but they're bitches
Ja'mie: Are they mean to you?
Ja'mie: Can you introduce me to them?
On #117 TABs:
Ja'mie: I try and avoid other cultures at all costs
Bec: But...I'm Asian
Ja'mie: I'm sorry, no offence to you, cos you're a hot Asian.
On #40 Formals:
"A school that bans formals is a school that bans life"
"Formals can give people hope. They give povo people something to live for."
So thanks to another genius work of art by HBO, betches across the globe were able to relate to their favorite 16/35 year old man-betch. And since you can’t party with Annabel Dickson this weekend, channel your inner Ja’mie King and be a naughty girl with a bad habit...in her honor of course.