Betch of the Week: Petra Ecclestone

By The Betches

It's possible you've never heard of today's betch of the week. That's because she's probably the closest we'll ever come to granting this honor to a non-celebrity...not to be uninspiring.

Petra Ecclestone is the British daughter of an Armani model and a rando billionaire, but she isn't your run-of-the-mill heiress. Sure she's friends with the Hiltons and all, but Petra is a little different. Mostly because Paris only has $50 million, meaning she's practically poor.

Petra possesses the obviously betchy qualities, like she's really pretty and #5 skinny, and no doubt a member of the Lucky Sperm Club. Petra modeled for a little, she designed some men's clothes...none of that really lasted. Whatevs, it happens. Betches aren't known for being particularly good at #36 work.


petraDon't think those monogrammed shoes distract us from his cross-eyes


But Petra isn't known for her partying and wild ways either, actually she's the complete opposite. That's because she contracted meningitis at 14 and has since has become a complete health freak and devoted to meningitis as a charitable cause. That's like, really sweet of her. We might even call her sensitive, but think again.

Petra, who's only 22, is known for her casual property-buying. No, she doesn't have a job, but in addition to her London mansion, Petra just bought Aaron Spelling's mansion in Los Angeles for like, 80-something million. Aside from the fact that this particular lot has already been #9 nicknamed "Candyland" after Spelling's wife Candy, Petra sealed the deal on this real estate gem by asking her betchy mom to borrow a cool 80 mil to pay for it. But mom, it was listed for $150! Memorial Day Sale! Ends tomorrow!

Gives new meaning to borrowing mommy's charge card.

In addition to collecting mansions, she also collects Birkins. Who collects Birkins? Remember when Samantha Jones had to fight Lucy Liu for one?

She also collects those boughie Rolex watches and has several rooms worth of clothing. Petra doesn't think she's spoiled though, just privileged!

Anyway, Petra is getting married this month to a rich Pro named James Blunt Stunt. He bought her a Bugatti for their engagement, which was 5 times the price of Rihanna's performance fee at their engagement party. Their wedding will be a 3-day event at a castle in Rome, probably followed by a yearlong honeymoon and then a lifetime spent interior decorating.


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