September 3, 2013
Ok so I am currently casually dating an insanely sexy guy who's like 4 years older then me and just overall perfect. He is constantly telling me that he wants to be more and that all he wants is me so the other night I brought up us being the big 'O' (official). He said because of our different schedules (Im in college and he's in grad school this year) that we should wait.
Since that conversation I really haven't heard from him which is super weird because we usually talk every day. Do you think I scared him off? Or am I just overanalyzing the situation like a crazy betch? Please help.
Spoke too soon?
Dear Spoke Too Soon,
Sorry to be the one to break it to you but you DEFINITELY spoke to soon. As a girl you should never be initiating any conversations regarding DTR unless it's been like over six months and you're ready to bail if he's not ready to commit. The guy should always be the one to move the relationship forward be that calling defining himself as your boyfriend, asking you to move in, meet his parents, marry you, etc..
By telling him that you want to be official you just fucking blew up all the mystery about you feel about him and effectively ended the entire chase. Bad call. The fact that he's not contacting you after you brought up this convo means he's trying to casually bail. The different schedules thing is complete bullshit and is just an excuse he made up because you put him on the spot and no guy is going to tell you "I like casually fucking you but have no desire to date you" to your face. Bros think of relationships like an amazing limited time end of summer sale. As in, they want them when they feel like they have to lock the betch down or she'll move on and they'll lose their chance, not when they feel like you're throwing yourself at them.
My advice on this one is to play it cool and start ignoring him a little bit when he eventually contacts you and start dating other guys. If you've got any shot with him this could reel him back in but if this doesn't work then the age old rejection tale rears its fugly face once again: he's just not that into you. Live and learn betch, let them come to you.
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