Angelina Jolie's New Movie Looks Weird As Shit

By Queen Elizabetch

Ten years ago, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt were both cast in Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and the world has never been the same. They fell in love, Brad divorced Jenn Aniston, and Brangelina was born. They pitted sorority sisters everywhere against each other as the Jenn v. Angie divide emerged. Well a decade and 400 kids later, Angie and Brad are starring in another movie together.

It's called "By The Sea," and Angelina wrote, directed, and starred in it, so she can stop with the overachieving thing. This is basically the adult equivalent of when you were 6 years old, drew a picture of your family, and emotionally manipulated your mom into hanging it on the fridge even though it was a terrible drawing. Like unless Brad wanted to never have sex again, he had to be in the movie and pretend like it was God's gift.

The trailer was released yesterday, and this movie looks like a sad, handwritten book. It's set in the 1970's, Brangelina is staying at a stunning hotel in France, and they fucking hate each other. So it's a documentary. The plot seems to revolve around something Brad did and now Angelina hates him, so did he forget to buy avocados from the grocery store or what? Watch the trailer and see what the married version of 50 Shades of Grey looks like.






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