December 29, 2014
Well, it’s that time of year again. The one that all betches have patiently waited, dreamed and most likely killed for. It’s time to announce our Betch of the Year that you all voted for. And let’s be honest, it wasn’t hard to see this one coming: your 2014 betch of the year is Cara Delevingne.
Love her, hate her or can’t pronounce her name, you have to admit that Cara Delevingne and her weird British face has pretty much ruled the world this year. She resurrected the power of the supermodel from the dead, all without having to be on Season 314 of ANTM. She forced everyone to finally acknowledge and OBSESS over eyebrows and she obviously got the London look, because she officially bumped Kate Moss into the “old news” category. Bye Felicia!
This year alone she was cast in the new highly anticipated movie “Paper Towns”, won the “Model of the Year” award, and managed to maintain a steady amount of Vine followers, which is most impressive since nobody uses Vine anymore. While doing all this, Cara partied harder than Lindsey Lohan in her lesbian days and maintained her notorious status of being a freakin weirdo.
By literal definition Cara is a certified betch.
Exhibit A) She’s got a good side. Cara attended several charity dinners and banquets this past year, including one hosted by Prince William. Like I’m sorry you donated a dollar to the ASPCA? Yeah, I donated money with royalty. Take a seat, betches.
Exhibit B) She has the hottest army of skanks in the business. Rihanna? Check. Victoria’s Secret models? Check. Yonce? Duh. Kendall Jenner and Taylor Swift? Unfortunate, but yes. Cara’s crew is basically a team of A-list babes, and everyone knows a crew is only as hot as their ugliest member. Can’t really find an ugly member, so they are all considered hot. Boom, that’s logic for ya.
Exhibit C) She takes day time naps in the middle of interviews (because staying awake during 30 minutes of boringness is unacceptable), eats bacon for like every meal, and openly parties like crazy. Much like the back building, her last f*ck burnt down in 1986. Which was about 5 years before she was even conceived - that’s how DGAF she is.
Besides all that, Cara also makes a ton of money for just, well, being herself. Would she make this much money/be so popular if she weren’t so entertaining? God no. And even though daddy is rich AF, Cara is an independent woman who don’t need no man. Gotta respect a girl who makes her own money doing something she is passionate about…wow that was Lifetime movie sentimental.
To conclude, Cara Delevigne is the poo, so take a big whiff. Your votes have spoken, so she’s also the 2014 Betch of the Year.
Don’t believe us? Here’s some great Cara quotes to prove she is deserving of Betch of the Year.
On sleeping habits: “I always wake up 10 minutes before I have to be anywhere.”
Her acknowledgement of shady bros: “I just don't think that I trust men. That's the problem. I can appreciate a beautiful-looking man, but he's not my type.”
Her quote which began the word “hangry”: “I get in the worst moods if I don't eat.”
On balancing “feminism” and “femininity”: “Victoria's Secret is really about celebrating women and what they stand for: the strength.”
Congrats Cara, and thanks to Little Women: LA on Lifetime for the sponsorship! Don’t miss the season premiere on New Year’s Day at 9/8c.