October 10, 2014
Apparently this year is on track to be the best year for job creation in the U.S. since the early 90’s. I think this is supposed to be something we’re proud of but I think it’s just because people make apps and blogs now instead of getting real jobs.
A teen was arrested at the O’Hare airport in Illinois this week trying to fly to Iraq to join ISIS. I guess that’s one way to avoid studying for the SAT.
The first guy in the US to get Ebola died this week…he was in Texas so I think it’s safe for Obama to allow them to secede from us now, ya?
Apparently Mitt Romney is considering running for president again. I was embarrassed I wore the same jeans today that I wore Monday but I gotta say Mitt’s round three is much more embarrassing.
Kim Jung Un reportedly fractured his ankles while walking to press conferences in small-heeled shoes that could not support his obese body. I don’t know whether to make a fat joke or use this as an opportunity to once again warn the world of the dangers of wearing kitten heels.