April 8, 2015
The 2015 Masters Golf Tournament marks Tiger Woods 20th appearance in the tournament. And while some of America is still cheering for the washed-up womanizer, the betches are taking a firm stance on the side of Tiger Woods' dissidents.
Betches hate Tiger Woods.
Tiger last won the Masters a decade ago. In 2005. When Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire was released.
Last time he won a major tournament? In 2008. A few months after Lindsay Lohan's first DUI arrest.
Tiger's downfall really began when he started sticking his man parts in every willing female. Literally, every. This shit broke the Internet back in 2009 back before Kim Kardashian's ass had a pulse of its own.
Tiger was sowing his seed with anybody with a pulse. The last reported number of affairs was in the low-thirties.
The worst part? Tiger's Head Betch in Charge, model wifey Elin Nordegren, had to find out from the tabloids. Naturally, she took a golf club to Tiger's car. Ten points to Gryffindor.
Ever since golf's greatest star got caught with his golf pants around his misogynistic ankles, Tiger has been horrible on the course. And he deserves it.
Because while Tiger is struggling to get his decrepit and STD-plagued body back on the golf course, ex-wife Elin bought a $100 million mansion with his money.
We can only hope that Tiger's current girlfriend, Lindsey Vonn, can figure her ish out before it's too late. Bye, Tiger. You most certainly cannot sit with us.