June 25, 2014
Current It-Betch Cara Delevingne was featured in Vogue this month, and in true betch fashion she showed up to her interview fashionably extremely late. In even betchier fashion, the interview was held at an exclusive London spa. Oh also she was late because she woke up 10 minutes before the interview, so literally she woke up like that. She also casually took a nap while she was supposed to be answering questions from Vogue. Whoops.
Apparently this is not a new thing, photographer Tim Walker said, “Every shoot I’ve done with her, she’s fallen asleep.” Obv the web wasted no time with their conspiracy theories, such as: it’s because she was out til 5 the night before raging with Lily Allen (um, sidenote, doesn’t Lily have children? WTF is she doing in the club?). This is a clear sign she’s a heroin addict. Cara herself says she’s just exhausted from jet-setting around the globe. But to me the solution seems obvious, and I’m concerned that no one has suggested that Cara clearly suffers from narcolepsy, a condition that currently affects 200,000 Americans. SAVE CARA.
Also protip: if you’re trying not to fall asleep, maybe next time have your interview at a Starbucks, instead of a place where you basically pay to take a nap.