December 18, 2014
Apparently it’s been a big few weeks for college sports, so we felt it necessary to do a special edition “College Athlete of The Week” in order to honor one of the hottest future pros still lingering around campus. This week we give a shout out to recent Heisman Trophy winner and Oregon quarterback, Marcus Mariota. Also known as the “Flyin’ Hawaiian,” in 2012 he was one of the first freshman to start a season opener for the Ducks and has pretty much been the goal of every jersey-chaser at the U of O ever since. Oregon has had consistently great football players in recent years, but what sets Mariota apart from the others is that he actually doesn’t get DUIs and bang thirsty sorority girls every weekend. *Slow clap* Instead he’s rumored to be super humble and shy, making him highly sought after.
Although only a junior, it’s whispered that he’s going to the NFL next season as the number one overall draft pick, which makes all the girls in his Spanish class he doesn’t attend super sad. To add to the humidity on campus, Oregon is set to play Flordia State, the team of last year’s Heisman’s winner Jameis Winston, at the Rose Bowl. It’s all so dramatic we can’t wait to get drunk for it and pay minimal attention. Win or lose, it’s clear he’s a pro in the making and we look forward to seeing him achieve his (mostly off-field) potential.