Cranberry Martinis to Wash Away Thanksgiving

By Betchy Crocker

When you’re sitting at the big Thanksgiving table, listening to Great Aunt Milly tell her story about you stuffing your face at your 2nd birthday for what feels like the millionth time, you could probably use a drink, or three. With the rich bounty of shit like pumpkin, apples, and cranberries this time of year, adding alcohol seems like the tamest thing you could do – and we’re all about that shit.

We already had an affinity for cranberries after being introduced to the South Beach Fat Flush where all you drink cranberry juice for 72 hours. That sounds really necessarily after gorging all day on turkey and potatoes and eight kinds of casseroles. Also, this isn’t a fucking Cosmo, but you could have one of those, too, if you’re planning on sitting in sweatpants and watching Sex and the City reruns for the rest of the afternoon. Just remember: your family’s comments about why you’re still single will get quieter the more of these you have.


  • Lime juice
  • Sugar for the rim
  • 8 ounces of vodka
  • 1 ounce of cranberry juice not fucking cranberry juice cocktail
  • 1 tsp red vermouth and yes it matters

Rub two martini glass rims with some lime juice then dip in the sugar for an adorable rim. Chill for like 15 minutes so it sets. Meanwhile, grab a cocktail shaker and combine ice, vodka, cranberry juice, and vermouth – shaking till it’s all cold and such. Strain into your chilled glasses. 




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