Dear Betch: I Have FOMO Because I'm Not In A Sorority

By Sgt. Olivia Betchson

Dear Betch,

Freshman year I decided to rush at my Big Ten university, after dropping because no house wanted my GPA and the cost was crazy. During my freshman year I dropped most of my friends (the few I had because I'm from out of state) dropping them since one didn't pay me gas for a road trip, and a few others for pretending to be hot shit because they discovered the indie music genre and Instagram filters. Now, I always see girls on Instagram and twitter post every thing sorority and I can't help but to feel jealous and left out. Maybe it's because I am in independent betch right now and I know betches shouldn't be jealous but I can't figure out how to get over this FOMO I am feeling.

Yours truly,


Dear Sisterless in Seattle,

Props to you on ditching your poor hipster friends, you’re well on your way to being a full-fledged betch. I wouldn’t know personally but I can imagine making friends in a big state school is tough, and I totally understand your FOMO. Also because I was in a sorority and NGL it was fucking dope. That being said idk what advice to give you. If you feel like you’re ready to join a sorority and you’re smarter and richer than you were freshman year, you could try again. Hopefully by now you know people in some of the good houses so you won’t get cut the first round. Unless you’re like a second semester junior than sorry you’re prob SOL. If you don’t actually want to rush again then I have bad news for you: you’re going to have to branch out. Join a club, talk to some betchy girl in your class, fucking do something other than trolling Instagram all day. You can find a group of besties to wear matching shirts and take unfiltered pregame pics with, you’re just going to have to put in a little work.

Delta Nu or die,

The Betches




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