This week we're throwing it back to our favorite animated Latina betch, Dora the Explorer, in honor of the voice actress who plays her getting caught vaping in her high school bathroom. Dora is a character you probably vaguely remember watching while weaning yourself off of our cultural zenith, 90’s Nickelodeon, or even more vaguely remember dressing up as for Halloween one year because you were wasted. Either way, she’s a staple of modern children’s television, which is why it’s so awesome that she smokes weed.
Before we get to the vaping drama of the present day, let’s review the reasons why Dora was an obvious stoner from day one:
1. She’s always wearing a backpack.
2. She’s constantly going on long "adventures" outside
3. Her best friend is a talking monkey
4. That map is definitely made out of rolling papers
Considering all of the glaring signs, it’s hard to believe that anyone could be surprised that Dora loves kush. But alas, people are dumb.
Now let’s fast forward to earlier this week, when the private high school that Fatima Ptacek, the 15-year-old voice of Dora, attends got slapped with a lawsuit. This stems from an incident last December when Ptacek and some not-celebrity-so-who-cares were both caught “using a vapor pen to inhale caramel-flavored water.” As a result, Ptacek was only suspended for three days and the not-celebrity-so-who-cares was expelled. The parents of not-celebrity are suing over this because they think Ptacek was given preferential treatment due to her ties to Hollywood. To which everyone replied, fucking duh.
The parents are seeking $40,000 in damages and want their daughter reinstated at the school, but no one cares at all because again, not-celebrity. My personal biggest concern from this story is the “caramel-flavored water” situation that’s happening in Dora’s vape. Do you need me to hook you up with my dealer, girl? Vamanos!