Betchocracy 2016: Wake Me Up When September Ends

By 50 Shades Of Betch


It’s September!! Besides getting shitfaced to celebrate whatever Labor Day represents, this also means that the election is only two months away! Trump had another…interesting week, and Hillary basically just went about her business and probably cackled a lot but we don’t actually know. Most importantly, after seeming to soften his position on immigration in recent weeks, Trump made a major speech in which he definitely, like, unsoftened. So yeah. And this weekend, Trump is doing a Q&A session at a black church. Should be fun!!

Batshit Ann

If you don’t know who Ann Coulter is, you’re welcome, because I just gave you hours of entertainment on YouTube. Ann has been one of the most outspoken/psycho Conservative pundits for a long time, and she’s 100% on the Trump train. After his speech this week where he solidified his stance on immigration, she basically lost what few marbles she had left on Twitter, saying “I think I’ll watch this speech every night before going to bed so that I will sleep like a baby.” Chill, Ann, your crazy is showing.

Taco Tuesday Forever


Speaking of batshit Trump supporters, Latino Trumper Marco Gutierrez warned on MSNBC this week that his people are “dominant,” and that if Trump isn’t elected we could face a future with “taco trucks on every corner.” Tbh that sounds incredible, except maybe for the spring break diet that was supposed to start last week.

Money Money Money

Wolf of Wall Street

Hillary Clinton is raising a lot of money. In August, her campaign raise $142 million dollars, by far her best month yet, and waaaaaay ahead of what Trump has been getting. Because of campaign finance laws, a lot of this money will go toward helping Democrats running in smaller state elections, but honestly there’s no downside for Hillary. She already has a lead, and having this cash on hand should give her some extra confidence in swing states.

Madam Melania

Melania Trump

It’s tough being Melania Trump. We all know about the speech thing, but now she’s got a lawsuit to deal with. She’s suing Daily Mail and some rando blogger for $150 million for printing rumors that she was a high-end escort back in Slovenia in the ‘90s. Tbh wouldn’t be that shocking if it was true, but we have no evidence so we’ll keep our mouths shut and avoid a lawsuit. Decide for yourself!




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