April 1, 2015
After breaking Ed Sheeran’s heart and shacking up with a One Direction member, Ellie Goulding is finally ready for a commitment. Judging from all her past relationships, Ellie ain’t got no type…except for the fact that they are all musicians: the androgynous Skrillex, Ginger Ed, Irish hottie Calvin Harris, and pre-pubescent Niall Horan have all found themselves in her repertoire. Finally she has found someone who really lights her fire, fire, fire. Strangely enough, she and new boyfriend Dougie Poynter (LOL), look more like twins than anything else. They share the same shoulder-length blonde locks, grunge-chic style and now the same tattoo.
In what appears to be a rash (most likely inebriated) moment of spontaneity, the two both got a skull and crossbones tattooed on their middle fingers. Is it meant to be some sort of “fuck you” to all their past relationships or is it some kind of romantic bullshit that only them two would understand? Whatever the reason, it’s not cute. Looking at Ellie’s track record, Dougie’s time is running out, but at least he’ll always have the symbol of death on his middle finger to remind him of her.