November 13, 2014
Eminem hasn’t been a piece of shit recently, so honestly it was about time for him to put himself back out there. In a recent freestyle to promote Shady XV, a Shady records compilation, Eminem raps about beating the shit out of Lana Del Rey.
“But I may fight for gay rights, especially if they dyke is more of a knockout than Janay Rice/Play nice? Bitch I’ll punch Lana Del Rey right in the face twice, like Ray Rice in broad daylight in the plain sight of the elevator surveillance/’Til her head is banging on the railing, then celebrate with the Ravens.”
I want to say I’m shocked, but then I remembered that this is the same guy who wrote an entire song about how he would graphically murder the mother of his child. And another one about his own mother burning in hell. It doesn’t take a fucking psych major to figure that one out. Careful Eminem, we’ve all seen American Horror Story; mommy issues never end well. This is especially douchey because Lana has said pretty nice shit about Eminem in the past. It's like, why can't we all get along like we used to in middle school?
Don’t word Lana, you’re in good company. Eminem has also called out Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and Mariah Carey for daring to be successful women. Like, who gave them the fucking right?
If we didn’t hate him so much, we might be impressed by his shit talking abilities. At the very least, Lana will always have Azaela Banks to back her up.