May 14, 2015
This week Starbucks introduced Frappuccinos for your baby. Ok, not really, but the Fraps are now being served in a teeny-tiny cup.
Starbucks introduced the new 10 oz. size as a way to appeal to people who couldn’t possibly bear to gulp down the extra 2 oz. of fat and sugar they’d get in a Tall.
Tall Frappuccinos contain about 300 calories and 100 calories from fat when ordered as they come on the menu, so making a slightly smaller size to appeal to people trying to “cut back” is super baffling. You really think 2 oz. is going to make or break your day? If you’re dieting and ordering a Frap at all you’re probably just really bad at dieting and nothing can save you at this point.
Coke and Pepsi have both been pretty successful with the sale of their products in smaller can sizes, which kind of makes sense because 7.5. oz is the perfect amount for a single-serve mixer. Plus, the tiny Diet Coke cans don’t overwhelm my small frame like the normal cans do.
Holding a small Frap is just going to make you look like you’re trying too hard, unless it's, like, medically necessary because you have weird, small baby hands a lá Kristen Wiig's doll-handed SNL character. In that case, go for it. If that's not the case, either DGAF and give up on your life by ordering a Venti with extra whip or step-up your diet game and order an iced coffee like a real betch and move on with your day.