For those of you who aren’t classy, allow me to elaborate on the best way to have coffee: a French press. Also known by such names as:
- press pot
- coffee press
- coffee plunger
- сafetière à piston
This cutesy device was designed by Italian designed Attilio Calimani in 1929 and works by forcing coffee through the press and into the coffee.
Why is it better? Because the coffee is coarser and less refined than your shitty Keurig cup or that Folgers you keep buying that drips through your coffee filter. Coffee is brewed by placing the ground coffee an empty beaker within the press and adding hot water; hence the pressing, duh. It gives you a better coffee flavor, a more syrupy (yas) consistency, and a borderline sweet flavor.
How to make perfect French press coffee: So, if your goal in life is to be a barista (or you have an art history degree and are accepting what you’re probs going to be doing for work), here’s how you make the perfect French press coffee:
- If you’re grinding your own coffee, you’ll want about 8 tablespoons for the 8-cup French press. You need to grind to about breadcrumb size.
- Preheat your French press by pouring hot water inside the pitcher and plunge so that everything gets niiiiiice and toasty. Discard the water. Think of it like icing your martini glass before the alcohol.
- Add the coarsely ground coffee to the French press and pour hot water (not quite boiling but really fucking close) into the French press, being sure to wet all the grounds. Pour water to about the halfway mark on the French press.
- This whole process is going to take a total of four minutes, so start your timer. After 1 minute of the 4 minutes (are you fucking following?), stir the “bloom” as in, all the grounds that kind of came up with the bubbles and foam and shit, and pour the rest of the water evenly to the top of the French press. Put the top on the French press.
- After you hit the 4 minute mark, plunge the French press (as in, push down on the plunger thing to push alllll the coffee grounds down and let all the water/coffee stay) and serve. Do this GENTLY.
- Don’t let the coffee sit in the French press with the grounds or else it’ll get bitter …. Kind of like how your relationship with your roommate ended up after she stole your Miu Miu heels last time.
So there you have it – how and why to get a French press coffee maker. I mean, think of all the art bros you can totally impress with this newfound knowledge!