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Hilary Duff Gave Her Baby A Very Confusing Name

We’ve come so far since the days of Lizzie McGuire, so it’s pretty crazy that Hilary Duff is still only 31 years old. These days, Hilary seems like she’s doing great, and last week she gave birth to her second child! She previously had a son, Luca, in 2012, with her then-husband Mike Comrie. They divorced in 2016, and now Hilary is with musician Matthew Koma. He’s very cute and a little bit edgy, and they seem super happy together. Overall, things seem great in the life of Hilary Duff. Unfortunately, we need to talk about her baby name choice.

Banks Violet Bair.

Banks? Banks?? Is this a name? Honestly, my first thought was Banksy, the famously mysterious graffiti artist. Cool guy, but not what I want to think about when I look at an adorable photo of Hilary Duff and her brand new bundle of joy. There’s also the singer Banks, who is cool—she’s kind of like an edgier Lana Del Rey, I guess—but still, not really the name I would choose for my child. (Also, Bair is Matthew Koma’s real last name, so that’s not like, a weird third middle name, don’t worry.)  But if you ask me, Violet Blair would have been a great name on its own—it sounds like the name of the slightly bitchy popular girl on a CW teen drama who really has feelings deep down—so why prefix it with the plural form of a financial institution?

Anyway, here’s *sighs* Banks.

Okay, this photo is glorious. Hilary looks radiant and so happy, and that really is a cute baby. A+ for this photographer, because I want to frame this and it’s not even my kid. In the spirit of nice things, I will also say that I really like Violet as a middle name. Violet is getting more and more popular, making a top 50 appearance the last few years after being below 200 just a decade ago. It’s a pretty name, but I always just think of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner’s daughter, so maybe that’s why Hilary didn’t choose Violet as the first name. Still, I feel like they could have chosen literally anything but a name that sounds like what you’d give to a preppy white guy from Connecticut who’s always threatening to call his lawyers.

In any case, Banks is adorable, Hilary looks happy, and it’s not my life so good for them. Now who knows how I can hire this photographer to take all of my Instagrams?

Images: Shutterstock; @hilaryduff / Instagram

Dylan Hafer
Dylan Hafer
Dylan Hafer has watched over 1000 episodes of Real Housewives because he has his priorities in order. Follow him on Instagram @dylanhafer and Twitter @thedylanhafer for all the memes you could ever want.