Some Actually Interesting Cocktails for the Holidays

By Betchy Crocker

Tis the season to be blackout. Honestly, what else are you going to do while you’re home for however many weeks with your parents?

Boredom, ugly sweaters, and high-calorie foods abound, and we need help. From a coconut YES COCONUT based eggnog to a pomegranate whiskey drank for the betches who go hard, we have all the alcohol you need to combat the wear and tear of the holidays. Oh, and look for part two of this list on Thursday, betches.

Coconut RumNog – serves 6

- 1 cup rum – we used Diplomatico Reserva Exclusiva cause it’s like, exclusive
- 1 cup maple syrup – use the good shit
- 1 cup heavy cream
- 1 ½ cups coconut milk – you can totes use light
- 1 pinch sea salt
- 3 eggs, separated into whites and yolks
- ½ tbsp. vanilla extract
- 2 tsps grated nutmeg
- 2 cinnamon sticks.
- Shredded coconut for garnish

So grab a giant bowl and mix together the rum, maple syrup, heavy cream, coconut milk, sea salt, egg yolks (not the whites, betch), vanilla, and nutmeg. Once that’s all blended and such, throw in the cinnamon sticks, cover, and chill for like two hours. Right before serving, using your KitchenAid mixer (if you don’t have one then bye), beat the egg whites until stiff peaks form. Gently fold them into the chilled eggnog mixture. Pour into glasses and garnish with shredded coconut. This is bound to be better than Aunt Mildred’s shitty recipe.



Pomegranate Bliss – serves one

- 1 ½ oz. whiskey – we used Usquaebach Premium Reserve Blend
- 1 tsp. sugar
- 1 tbsp. pomegranate seeds
- 2 dashed Angostura bitters
-Orange peel and cinnamon stick for garnish

This one is super fucking easy so pay attention. In a rocks glass, add the sugar, pomegranate seeds, and bitters then muddle until the sugar is dissolved. Grab a large ice cube and the whiskey and gently stir everything together. Garnish with the orange peel and cinnamon stick and serve.




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