Should I Tell My Hook Ups Girlfriend That He's Been Cheating On Her? Dear Betch...

Dear Betch,

I think I already know what to do; I should sit back and let Karma come around and hit this girl for her own inability to see what has happened. But anyways, I was sleeping with this guy I met off Tinder in January 2014 for about a year and a half. It was really on again, off again, but at the start (in 2014) it was so on to the point that I even slept with him at his work (security guard at the hospital, it’s not just those doctors getting McSteamy). Most of the reasons it went off was because I would be home 600 miles away from school and can’t hook up --long distance hookups are just not a thing. Anyways, in August 2015 he finally asked  me what would happen if he wanted to get serious with another girl and it’s so not cool to be the other women so I said we would finish this. I wished him good luck with everything. Then, while waiting for late night pizza one night, three months later, after one too many glasses of wine, I texted him telling him I missed sleeping with him. My bad! BUT he responded with “tell me more…” loser.

Skip three weeks after that awful wine flu, he requested to follow me on Instagram and I allowed him to and then I requested to follow him. While waiting for the request (that never came) I went to do what typical girls do and Instagram stalk his friends so I picked the first account Instagram suggested.The first picture on this account was HIM with a girl three weeks ago in Italy and an engagement ring!! The caption said you're typical “…and 7 years later I said YES!” …...SEVEN YEARS? This whole time he was making me his other women!

PLOT TWIST: I googled her name and as it turns out she will be a teaching assistant to one of my professors next semester! My question betches, is what do I do? My friends and family have all given me very mixed responses. I really do not want anything to possibly mess with my academic career. Do I tell her her fiancé is Mark King-ing her for the past two years? Do I sit back and do nothing and just hope Karma works it course? Do I even have reasons to be concerned about this at all?


The Other Women, Carly Whitten


Sorry for the delayed response, I just got out of the ER for a severe face-palm injury. I actually was one of the 10 people who saw The Other Woman and I still had to google who Mark King and Carly Whitten are... a crappy Cameron Diaz/Kate Middleton movie is not like some cultural touchstone, smfh. This reference is not as funny as you think it is, certainly not funny enough to be used twice. Sorry, not sorry (also not sorry I used a super-old phrase because, if it ain't broke...).

Yeah, I see the moral dilemma you're in. On the one hand, you don't "owe" this girl anything. On the other hand, if it were you, would you want to know that the man you're about to marry is a lying, cheating, double-life-leading asshole? I think you probably would. Despite all that, though, I'm kind of inclined to tell you to stay out of it because you seem kind of crazy. One, you're blaming this (probably innocent) girl for "her own inability to see what has happened" and hoping karma will get her in the end. Like...way harsh, Tai. How is it her fault that she's getting cheated on? Maybe she's in denial or totally oblivious, true, but maybe her fiancé is like a deceptive mastermind, you don't know what the situation is. If anyone deserves karma biting them in the ass, it's the cheater. Like, damn.

If you were a sane person who felt genuinely guilty and wanted to do the right thing (or like, you knew this girl), I would say that you give her the hard proof of your relationship (key) and then disappear, letting her do whatever she sees fit with the information and having no involvement with either of them ever again.  But...idk, your misplaced aggression towards this girl, your drunken bootycall attempt after the fact, etc. makes me feel like you are really just salty about things not working out with this dude and want to fuck up this relationship for revenge purposes. So for that reason, and the fact that you haven't slept with this guy in like, over 3 months and you really don't know what's happened in his relationship since then, I think you should do nothing and forget this shitty guy exists. Forget him, and your bad movie references.
You do know "women" is plural, right?

The Betches

Got a fucked up problem but your therapist will just tell you to stop drinking? Email us at [email protected] and you just might get a response. 




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