October 29, 2013
So i'm currently a freshman betch and im over the hookup scene. I met an awesome guy a few weeks ago and i think we really hit it off. At the time, however, i was hooking up with a guy on his swim team so i didnt answer his texts.
Last weekend we recconnected and i ended up sleeping at his house because i lived far away and we were too drunk to walk. We only made out. What i'm wondering is when would be the appropriate time to sleep with him. People dont really go on dates here, we just hangout on the weekends. I'll hang with him at a party this weekend and he'll probably try to get me to go home with him again.
I want him to take me seriously, so i dont want to sleep with him too soon but i'd rather him be a hookup buddy than nothing and i'm worrried if i dont sleep with him i run the risk of him getting bored and not talking to me ever again. At my school, it would be very easy for him to find another pretty betch to sleep with. I really want this to work out what should i do!
Dear Needy Betch,
If you have to worry about him hooking up with someone else because you won't sleep with him you should DEFINITELY NOT sleep with him. You should only sleep with someone after you're confident that they respect you and you're both on the same page. If a guy does things for you that are public, difficult, and/or expensive then those are signs he truly respects you.
He doesn't necessarily have to take you on dates being that this is college and I get that at most schools that's relatively rare, but being affectionate towards you in public, hanging out with you sober, or helping you out with something that is more difficult than pouring you roofied jungle juice into a solo club are all good signs that this guy is not a douchebag asshole that you will regret sleeping with.
If there's one thing I've learned it's that when in doubt you'll never regret NOT having sex with a guy but you can't take back fucking someone and then feeling like shit about it. If he moves on and finds a sluttier girl that will sleep with him sooner, you'll be glad you dodged that bullet.