February 26, 2015
Despite its bad reputation, the Friend Zone is not always so bad. For bros looking to get into the end zone, getting the platonic treatment can seem like a punishment. But betches know that bros in the friend zone are like glass collectibles – we cherish and love having them, but we don’t want to touch them or they’ll break.
First of all, every bro that makes your acquaintance is showing an interest in you. But whoever said bro’s and betches can’t be friends was right because we can only be friends with sexual tension. However, since this sexual tension is only something he has to deal with not you since you're not interested, there are many ways to friend zone to your advantage as long as you're in control.
Generally speaking, bros you friend zone are ones you are genuinely excited to see, but the idea of their dick in your mouth makes you want to gag. So keep it friendly with friend flirting, but nothing more. A text with overly excited emojis and too many exclamation marks telling him you can’t wait to see him is how you feel, but it’s also telling him that you’re not trying to play hard to get, therefore you’re obviously not into him that way. If it’s still not clear to him, he should pick it up when you start asking him for advice on whether you should text Mark back and like, should you use punctuation?
Bros complain about the friend zone, but they secretly love it when it’s a betch’s friend zone. That’s because once a bro is a friend, you’ll invite him to your pregames and he’ll instantly have access to all your hot friends. If you’re lucky, he’ll hook up with a few of them, and then you’ll have a pretty good excuse not to hook up with him if he ever tries again.
You can also drop cues when you hang out, to let him know he’s definitely in the friend zone. For example, if you’re hanging out one on one, mention that you have to leave after drinks because you have a date. Be sure to mention that you haven’t been on a date in a while, and omg, ughh it’s going to be so annoying. Any suspicion he had that you two were on a date will be erased.
While the bros you date come and go, the friends you make stick around. When you’re feeling domestically inclined to cook a homemade dinner or bake brownies, you invite him over, not the bro you’re hooking up with. He’s gone shopping with you and explained sports to you, so that you can look nice and seem chill when you’re hanging out with your weekend hook-up. Some may say that he’s losing out by being in the friend zone, but we say he’s winning your friendship, and you don’t just give that out to anyone.