January 8, 2015
The summer months have already been astutely titled ‘bikini season,’ but there’s a lesser known winter equivalent: leggings season. Betches everywhere hit the elliptical for hours to create the illusion that their legs happen to be fatless and toned year-round so they look amazing in the unofficial winter uniform: leggings and boots. We didn’t invent the move, but we know you’re all doing it.
The amazing and appalling thing about the lul-iform is that it is basically the equivalent of being naked from waist down - that’s how much wiggle room you have. None. Little extra Christmas weight on the rear? Yeah I know, I saw it. Leggings are unforgiving and anyone who thinks they’re neutral and flattering is an idiot.
There are always going to be those annoying people who think black leggings camouflage everything. Those people are wrong, obviously. Just because your leggings are black doesn’t mean I can’t see your legs. I’m not trying to body shame, do whatever you want, but know that black isn’t camo and form-fitting is form-fitting no matter what color.
Leggings and boots is the outfit equivalent of peanut butter and jelly, or kale and something else healthy and gross. They just go together. The boot part of the equation is obviously important. Most of us who have moved on from 2002 know that Uggs are not okay in public, but there are a few stragglers. For all those hanging onto those early millennium years, it’s time to move on.
We’re all about the leggings and boot combo, just please be informed when wearing it. AKA no Uggs and everyone can see every part of your legs, despite what you may think.