June 24, 2015
We betches are superior beings, but not everyone in this world shares our grace and common sense. In fact many people don’t, and when navigating the waters of society we’re often faced with blatant idiocy that can only be met with disbelief and rage. Idiots come in all types, but some common ones include overly opinionated Facebook commenters, passive aggressive coworkers, and Time Warner phone employees. We could go on, but you get the point.
While it’s perfectly fine to get angry, it’s not worth wasting our time with dim-witted idiots. Much like our other emotions, we keep our anger reserved only for those that truly deserve them. The trick to maintaining your zen when you’re faced with the most un-zen is simply this: treat everyone like you’re a dude whose girlfriend just told you she’s mad because she had a dream you cheated on her.
First of all, imagining this scenario isn’t hard, considering it’s been universally happening for years with no regard for common sense. Getting angry over dreams is like believing the only reason you’re not in the Olympics is because you gave up track in the ninth grade. Yet, everyday some idiot wakes up angry over a dream that nobody is interested in hearing. Except for her boyfriend, because if he doesn’t act like he cares he’ll stop getting fucked. Therefore, put yourself in this selfless man’s shoes and treat everyone like they’re your girlfriend that you still want to fuck but who is being a total idiot in this moment. Aka, you never tell her she's wrong, because fucking duh she is and any third party can see that. But it's a lose/lose situation and you're not about that life.
Treat everyone like this and you’ll be so calm that the guy who cut you off in traffic is going to think you’re Mother Teresa. Literally, the only way to deal with idiots is to pretend you like them because the last thing you want to do is lose your zen with a cable company employee that was born with half a brain. He cannot comprehend your anger and instead translates that to glee. So don't waste your time.
To be clear, we’re not saying that you should let people walk over you. We’re just saying that when faced with idiocy that is so rooted in someone’s nature that no amount of teaching, love, or anger, will change them, it’s much better to save your own energy for someone with more intellect. Aka keep your cool, you ice queen, and you'll still be winning at the end of the day.