April 13, 2015
So there you are, enjoying an iced coffee with a bestie when your phone blows up with an unwanted blast from the past. UGH. Nothing can fuck up a betch’s day quite like the surprise Ex Text.
Whether they just wanted to “say hey” or were wondering if they left an X-Box controller at your place (the answer is always no), don’t be surprised if the classic ex text throws you off guard.
If it’s him texting you or you texting him, an ex text only screams one thing: thirsty.
If you broke up months ago or just yesterday the most important thing is to do is channel your inner hair flip emoji and DGAF about whats-his-face and whatever bullshit reason he has for contacting you.
You can bet your ass if you were the one who texted him he’d tell his bros you were being, like, really clingy and needy and just really wanted to talk to him. Likewise, that’s definitely the reason he’s texting you.
After remembering that you don’t give a shit about this person or their missing sweats (you’re keeping those btw), consider your options on when or if you’re going to respond.
If the break up was a while ago and you two are mostly cordial, a few hours before responding seems fair. If the break up was recent or messy, delete the text as to not see that fugly name in your messages and move on with your day, but not before making fun of his neediness with your friends.
Whatever you do, don’t let the ex text turn into a full on convo. There’s a reason why you broke up, and an extended text conversation only leads to an argument or a pathetic post-breakup hook up. Gross.
If you’re bored and feel need to text a dude let your BBB fill that gap, better yet, your new BF should give you something to do with your hands.