August 21, 2014
On this week's very special edition of GYST Sunday, we're interviewing the funniest betch on Bravo. If you've never tuned into Bravo to watch Patti Stanger school successful pros and ridiculous women on how to land a hot, rich husband than you're seriously missing out. Patti is known for not giving a fuck and it has been an unbelievable honor to interview someone with her level of hilarity and success. Check out this interview for some serious tips on how to be a power betch in a man's world.
I thought I was going to move to Hollywood and be Sherry Lansing. I was going to run my own film studio, but unfortunately I got derailed. The Millionaire’s Club started because I wanted to get out of credit card debt. Every five minutes the Silicon Valley millionaires were coming to Hollywood, but none of them knew how to date! It was the golden years of Bill Clinton and the internet, so I started the club, got out of credit card debt and it ended up being a real business.
I don’t have time to dedicate to every area of the business I want because I’m very much a leader. I like to be in the creative process. It’s hard when you’re shooting 14 hours a day, 5 months a year and then I’m on call to do press for the show. I don’t have a lot of time to get the details right and that bugs me. It’s also very tough getting the right staff. I get people who are fame whores, people that want to use me or people that want to date my clients or staff members. It’s very hard to find quality people to work for me.
The jewelry line, Je T’aime, is a homage to my father, who was a jewelry manufacturer. Ever since I was a little girl, I was drawn to sparkly things. My mom told me that when I was 3 years old, she brought me to the most expensive jewelry store in South Orange, New Jersey. She put me up on the counter and I lifted a diamond tennis bracelet that she embarrassingly had to return. What can I say? A girl can never have enough diamonds! Je T’aime is a costume jewelry line that looks and feels real. The style is very Regency Glamour and has an old world feel. The line has everything from earrings, necklaces, rings to bracelets. I actually had the jewelry blessed by a sacred healer, so that when you wear it, your wish comes true. My tshirt line is something that I never really thought about, it was really my boyfriends idea! People kept writing in telling me to put my Pattiisms on things, so we did it. The whole line is unisex, so anyone can wear any shirt, tank or hoodie!
The most embarrassing thing was my own mixer on the show. My staff, who knew me for years, didn’t get the right guys for me. That was totally embarrassing. After all the years of training them they got me wrong. That wasn’t humiliating, that was fucked up. Like they still work for me now? Not!
The funniest celebrity I’ve met is Paul Rudd. He’s so androgynous and hot, I thought he was gay, but actually he’s married with kids! When I hosted the “I Love You Man” commercial for Bravo, the director was mad because he kept going on these tangents. He wanted me to go apeshit “Matchmaker” on Paul, but I couldn’t because he kept making me crack up! One thing he wouldn’t stop talking about was his favorite show, “Project Runway.” He could imitate all the characters from the show and would go “I have to get home, I have to watch ‘Runway’”. He just kept making me and Jason Segal laugh because he is just such a natural comedian. I must say though, Jenny McCarthy comes in a close second for funniest, hottest celebrity chick alive.
With reality shows, it’s really hard because our network is like high school. We all call it “Bravo High” and I’m a bit jaded in that department because I’m friends with everyone (except for a Bravo Betch or two). I watch Flipping Out and the Housewives because they’re my friends and we all like to know everyone else’s dirt. I’m not gonna deny that I watch the Kardashians; I love watching it for the fashion and staying up on the latest plastic surgery. Who knows? Someday I might need a butt implant! I also absolutely love Shark Tank ￼because I love seeing people talk about business and seeing new innovations. As for scripted shows, I love scifi and occult stuff. I’m into True Blood, Ray Donovan, Witches of East End, American Horror Story: Coven, The Originals and The Strain. I love anything witchy and magicy because I used to be a Wiccan. I practically cried when AHS: Coven was one season, but I’m more in the days of The Sopranos. If anyone gets it right, it’s HBO. I recently fell in love with Ja’mie: Private School Girl and would love Chris Lilley to be on my show. I’m also obsessed with anything that Netflix does, like House of Cards, Orange is the New Black, and Hemlock Grove.
The best part about working for myself is that I can make a million dollars in my underwear!
The best perk of my job is the fashion! I get an allowance for the show, it’s not a lot but I get discounts from designers who are friends with us. I love DVF, Alice + Olivia, and Rent the Runway. It’s great to get in and learn the business of styling and what’s trending. I just love the clothing. Another great part of my job is getting a reservation at a really great restaurant that’s all booked for the night. The only problem is everyone there wants me to fix them up, so I can’t keep them from the table to enjoy the meal with my boyfriend. And let’s not forget about getting invited to all my weddings. It also helps with my credits in the “Bank of Heaven”!
Oxytocin is surging through your brain because estrogen soars if you’re under 40. It’s telling you “It’s okay to bond! He had a cocktail and I had a cocktail, I’m Juicy Goosey, let’s go!” But then, is he gonna call you in the morning? Is he gonna take you seriously? Is he going to introduce you to his family? Is he going to give you a ring? Is he gonna have your children? NO! Because you were too easy fucking breezy. If you spread too soon, he will walk away. 90% of the time, men are thinking “Am I really going to marry the girl who slept with me on the first date?.” Let them hunt you down and make it hard for them. Bambi doesn’t go into the forest and say “Hey! Come get me!”
Bribe them! Or just learn to delegate.
1. Men who don’t ask women out because they assume the woman is taken
2. People who don’t follow through, especially on dates.
3. People who aren’t authentic or are true to themselves in order to get what they want. 4. Inconsistency
5. Selfish people
This one is from the show! On Season 2, I almost got hit by Josie the Giant, who was a date crasher. In reality TV, sometimes they’ll bring in a ringer to stir the pot and she was a BIG ringer. It was a brunette mixer and this 6 foot blonde Amazon woman decided she should come. She claimed she was the only Jewish girl in Playboy and kept saying “I’m gonna get on the show, I’m gonna get my own show”. Then she started dissing everyone and she tried to hit me. That’s when my BFF makeup artist Tiffany pulled me into the bathroom.The girls were crying, and they called 911. I almost got killed that day but the production company was too cheap to get me security. As she tried to hit me, the producers kept filming and I realized if she had made contact, they wouldn’t have stopped. So when you watch my show, know that everything is real and is happening in real time!