August 18, 2014
Apparently Betch of the Year Jennifer Lawrence and Mr. Gwyneth Paltrow - Chris Martin - are hooking up and can we just say - ew. Not only are they the world's most tragic mismatched couple - JLaw won a fucking Oscar and and Chris won a couple VMAs - but is this is actualy like Chris Martin going from dating a stuck up WASP with a stick up her ass to the 'quirky' girl who sells soaps at the mall. Obvi we love Jen's fuck off attitude but Gwen has GOOP! Ugh, we're gonna need
a vodka red bull spiritual guidance to make a decision.