July 9, 2015
Break out the orange soda, Kel is heading back to Nickelodeon.
If you don’t recall, Kel was half of the superstar combo of “Keenan and Kel” who were pretty much Nickelodeon royalty. We’re talking vintage Nick, as in, AOL dial up was barely a fetus, so we spent a shit-ton of time in front of the TV watching shows like Hey Arnold! and Rocket Power (sorry to ruin your childhood, but like, that guy Ray was a total stoner).
Kel was also on All That, in the good old days before Amanda Bynes went psycho and was spending her time hanging out with dancing lobsters and playing Moody from “Moody’s Point.”
You probs remember Keenan still because he’s actually famous right now and killing it on SNL. Kel, on the other hand, kind of faded into oblivion after he turned, like, 18, which is the kiss of death for a Nickelodeon star.
Apparently Kel Mitchell is alive (who knew?) and has been doing club appearances at which he pretends to host orange soda drinking contests. No joke.
He’s done with the club life now, and heading back to the Nick family to play a boring old adult on a new show they’re calling Game Shakers. From the title, I assumed it would be about those bratty kids that flip board games over when they start losing (that was prob you before your French au pair moved in, tbh), but it’s about two little girls who invent an app and make a bunch of money from it. iCarly 2.0, anyone? Exactly. Yawn.
Jurassic Park is back, there could soon be a Clinton in office, and Kel is returning to Nickelodeon. Life is one big TBT right now, and I’m not mad about it.
If I ate things with more than 100 calories in them, I’d raise my burger to you, Kel, and say: "Welcome to Good Burger, home of the Good Burger, can I take your order?"