August 7, 2015
In today's edition of make news that'll make someone a lot of money, Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy have announced that they're breaking up. Of course they're both fucking fictional, so it was some poor intern who probably had to post about it on Facebook. In the past, Miss Piggy has been a devoted follower of the Betches lifestyle, but she committed a cardinal sin by posting a long Facebook status about the breakup.
If you're wondering why anyone cares enough to cause drama in a fictional relationship, we have a feeling it might have something to do with the new Muppets TV show that premieres this fall. Idk why people really care about The Muppets anymore, but like cool I guess. If we had to guess, Kermit and Piggy will get back together soon, just like Barbie and Ken did a few years ago..