October 15, 2014
Lady Gaga, the meat dress wearing psychopath, is no longer in a bad romance. She and boyfriend Taylor Kinney (Mason Lockwood from Vampire Diaries and an extra in Zero Dark Thirty) are reportedly "committed" as in they had a commitment ceremony as in they had dinner and told people they were committed. This is some hipster marriage bullshit. They didn't want to get married - good move Taylor, I wouldn't want to be strapped for the rest of my life to someone who thought the Applause music video was a good idea - but they didn't want to keep dating either.
This is the 21st century, you don't have to get married just so people know you weren't on a break. Their unofficially official titles are now "Partners." Unless that title is attached to a law firm or business, nobody fucking wants it. But like whatever, Mazel Tov on your commitment. If Lady Gaga can find someone, then even the most bat shit crazy betch has hope.