January 15, 2015
Our morning LOL comes to you directly from In Touch Magazine, who decided to photoshop Bruce Jenner into looking like a woman (more so than he already does) for their cover story. The photoshop expert at In Touch clearly went rogue and decided to use a basic iphone app to create the changes because I've seen better photoshop on Beyonce's Instagram.
Although Bruce has never actually come out about his desires to be a woman, there has been some questionable outfit and lifestyle choices by Daddy Jenner to make us believe this could be somewhat true. I mean, we've all seen the nail polish and lip plump that he's been rocking lately. Which brings me to another thought- why are the Jenner's so fucking obsessed with their lips? What do they do in that household? Sit around the kitchen table and apply lip liner together?
Of course his ex-wife Kris Jenner is pissed because god forbid she be associated with a tranny. She says what the magazine is doing is "mean" but we all know that's code for "don't mention anything about him being married to me for 20 years, and you can do whatever the fuck you want." She's running around and covering her tracks in Hollywood - "he was only half a woman when I fucked him!"
I'm not trying to stand up for any member of the Kardashian mafia, but easily the most offensive part of the whole thing is the hideous peach colored lipstick they have on Bruce. If you're going to make him a woman, at least make him a hot one (Kris totally agrees). Whoever told In Touch that peach is the new red is seriously fucking disturbed.