Malia Obama Caught Playing Beer Pong On College Visit

By Jane Duh

As many of you may know, Malia Obama is in the process of deciding where she will be blacking out for the next four years. So far Malia has already racked up a legit insane number of college visits, with reports of her having visited Harvard, Tufts, Yale, Wesleyan, NYU, Princeton, Columbia, Stanford and UC Berkeley, which I guess you get to do when your dad is president and you have your own plane.
Why didn’t we hear anything about those visits? Well, because the students at the 200+ universities she’s visited his year had enough chill not to like, blast off about it on social media.

Students at Brown University, however, are narcs. And for that reason, we have this incredible snap…

Yep, that’s our girl Malia casually hanging by the pong table looking appropriately bored.

First thing's first to whoever snapped this--- pretty sure Malia Obama is not your new best friend and also doesn't GAF about you enough to even notice you're taking pics of her. Also pretty sure that Malia Obama is my new best friend we just haven't met yet because I'm a 25 year old comedian with $25 in checking and no way to get to DC right now.

But I digress.

Anyway, Brown students, who you’d think would know how to fucking control themselves considering Emma Watson went there, literally could not stop tweeting about it. 

malia obama was taking shots and playing beer pong at a party last night LOL
— colin (@colindamnit) October 11, 2015


Lol indeed, Colin. Very cool of you. Way to keep it together.

Now, honestly, I’m just happy to see that Malia is smart enough to check out the party scene on her college visits before settling down at some fancypants school full of Hermiones (take Brown, for example). I’m also happy to see that Malia has learned the valuable lesson that in college, you never know who is shadily snapping pics of you at a party. Beware out there girl, college is a whole fucking thing. 

Also, she looks great. Doesn’t she look great? 




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