August 3, 2015
Mark Zuckerberg, the inventor of Facebook (ever heard of it?), and his wife Priscilla are having a baby daughter, I'm assuming she already has a Facebook page. They announced the pregnancy in the nauseating way that makes every single betch reach for the nearest bottle of wine - with a Facebook status. But I guess that's a little bit different than when your sorority sister announced her engagement with a Facebook life event, because he like invented the whole fucking thing.
Mark's status update featured a family photo of him, his wife, and their dog, who looks like a stuffed animal from heaven. While Priscilla looks like a fucking Anthropologie model, Mark is wearing head to toe Target mens basics, but it's okay because he's 31 and already had an Oscar nominated movie made about his college years - you're SnapChat story is nice too.
Anyway, mazel to the Zuckerbergs. I hope the Winklevoss twins sue Mark for stealing their favorite baby name..