A few Vanderpump Rules episodes ago, Stassi decided to diagnose all her shitty friends with mental disorders. Tbh, I forgot what she said they all had because that was weeks ago and I’ve gotten blackout at least six times since then. All I remember is that her illness was alcoholism which is laughable because all these assholes are borderline functioning alcoholics at minimum—they’re way more fucked up than a mild drinking problem. So we’ve decided to give a more accurate diagnosis of the entire cast. Just call me Dr. Lisa Vanderbetch today.
This one is fucking obvi because Jax steals shit on the reg like sunglasses in Hawaii and silverware from SUR. Tbh, we could have gone with about nine different disorders for Jax, but like, this one is specifically unique to him because as fucked up as everyone else is, they aren’t goddamn burglars.