January 30, 2015
Growing up as baby betches we can all relate to that one friend that had her birthday party at the pottery place where we all sat around painting puppy piggy banks and fugly plates our moms hid in the corner of a random room as “decor.” But as a kid, we saw ourselves as an emerging artist with endless possibilities. We begged for an easel, a canvas, and the best paint money could buy so that we could hone our skills and express our creativity. Then we got over it in about 30 seconds and decided we wanted to be a veterinarian or a singing superstar after seeing the Lizzy McGuire Movie. Whatever. Now, as legal betches, this idea comes back in a whole new, modernized, and way more fun form: Painting while intoxicated.
There are trendy places popping up all over the country dedicated to the idea of women getting together, cracking open a bottle of wine, indulging in a cheese platter, and pretending they actually have artistic skills. These places have trendy names including anything from Wine and Canvas, Pinots Palette and Painting with a Twist. Let’s be honest, any childhood activity can be brought back and made more fun with alcohol (such as Trivia and Karaoke), and everyone knows betches like to believe we’re artistic and crafty, even though 90% of us couldn’t make it past level one in Martha Stewart 101.
The best part is that if your piece of art comes out terrible, you blame it on the alcohol and pawn it off as a gift to your mother-in-law. If you find out you’re a half decent painter and would actually consider putting it in your own house, you claim the alcohol only emphasizes your creative side, kind of like how guys claim to always be better at playing pool or darts while intoxicated. So at the end of the night you get a decent buzz and a painting worthy of an Instagram post *insert paint pallet emoji here.* Whether it be as a way to bond with your besties, emasculate your boyfriend, or just an excuse to get drunk - mixing acrylics and pinot is a brilliant betchy activity.