August 18, 2014
Betches are beginning to face the cruel reality that summer is coming to an end. It's no longer going to be acceptable to lounge by the pool all day and black out at night. We are now going to have to find a new daytime activity while we mourn the end. Ugh, Decembetch why are you so far away?
Unlike any other normal person on this planet, Starbucks is really trying to move this end of summer shit along. They are releasing their best selling seasonal drink, the Pumpkin Spice Latte on August 26. Yes you read that right. Because it's just so fucking cold at the end of August that we need to warm up with a nice steaming latte.
The lamest part about this early release is that in order to get the drink before the official nationwide launch on September 2, you have to participate in some scavenger hunt on Twitter using the handle @TheRealPSL.
Who knows what this online scavenger hunt even entails (and who cares), but if you're spending the last precious days of August sitting in front of your laptop trying to figure out how and where you can get a steaming fucking hot drink that is the epitome of the beginning of fall, you need to reevaluate your life. Get outside and get some more sun so you're not some pasty loser on top of being obsessed with this pumpkin shit.