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A Ranking Of The 10 Most Dramatic Celebrity Breakups Of 2017

If you brought a new boyfriend home to Thanksgiving and you’re still together as you’re reading this, congratulations. Not everyone can make it, which is why today we’re reminiscing on the most dramatic celebrity breakups of 2017. Cheers to the ones you remember, and pour one out for all the ones you forgot about. It’s been a long year.

10. Chris Pratt & Anna Faris

Tbh this one was only really dramatic because we’re psychopaths who care too much about this, but whatever. They always seemed like a normal, fun married couple with no reason for drama, but obviously shit happens. They released a diplomatic statement about how they have all this respect for each other, because of course.

I Was Rooting For You

9. Fergie & Josh Duhamel

Like with Chris and Anna, we really didn’t see this one coming. They got married at the height of their fame in 2009, but things probably started to go downhill when they named their son Axl. Tbh the last straw for Fergie was probably when she found out Josh was doing ANOTHER Transformers movie. How are they still making those?

8. Katy Perry & Orlando Bloom

Resident weirdest girl in school and our favorite pirate called it quits in February after a year of dating. There’s no way to know for sure, but maybe Orlando didn’t love the short blonde hair and annoying publicity stunts?

Katy Perry SNL

7. Robert Pattinson & FKA Twigs

Who would we be if we didn’t update you on Edward Cullen’s life? After Rob said last year that they were “kind of engaged” (ladies, you have permission to key your man’s car if he ever says that), they reportedly broke up earlier this year. Guess he should have “kind of” tried a little harder, because she’s been hanging out with a male model.

6. Nicki Minaj & Meek Mill

Nicki had previously been coy about whether she and Meek were engaged, but she officially announced that they were over in January. Looks like she dodged a bullet, as Meek is now in prison for 2-4 years for violating his probation. Good job Nicki, you got out just in time.

Nicki Minaj

5. Selena Gomez & The Weeknd

We may or may not have already written some stories about this, but it’s literally so good. Have fun with Justin and Bella, kiddos, and use protection!

4. Scott Disick & Bella Thorne

We might never actually know what went on here, but what we do know is that Bella came home from Cannes early, and she was replaced with a hotter girl the next day. There are conflicting reports about how *together* they actually were, but whatever. Bella’s basically been spiraling since, while Scott got with Sofia Richie and probably a bunch of other 19-year-old models.

Bella Thorne

3. Jennifer Hudson & David Otunga

We weren’t expecting much from this breakup, but it’s really been bringing the drama. Last week, Jennifer got an emergency order of protection, which also means David doesn’t get to see their son. This one is gonna be messy, but we really hope Queen J-Hud is okay.

2. Janet Jackson & Wissam Al Mana

You might be wondering why Janet and this guy you’ve never heard of are on this list, but hear me out. Wissam is a rich businessman from Qatar, and their prenup stated that Janet would get $100 million in the divorce if she stayed for five years, and $200 million if there was a baby. So what did Janet do? You better believe she stayed for five years, had a baby, and got the hell out of there with the money. 

Joanne The Scammer

1. Mel B & Stephen Belafonte

It’s important to be there for the Spice Girls when one of them is in a time of need, and Mel B’s divorce was a fucking dumpster fire. Stephen allegedly got the nanny pregnant, paid for the abortion, and was violently abusive towards Mel. Basically, he’s a trash human. Scary Spice deserved a less terrifying husband.