Real World Roundup: Fuck Me I'm An Olympian

By The Betches

The Wikipedia article about Kate Middleton's wedding dress is causing a big controversy, if you can call anything that goes on behind the nerdy scenes of every betch's fountain of knowledge to be legitimate controversy. Even though the article is currently still there, apparently it was flagged for deletion and has led to debate about the quality of articles on Wiki because one editor called it "frankly, trivial." I mean this person is frankly, a fucking loser. Seriously Kate Middleton's wedding dress is the most formative news story of the past 2 years for me and if I want to know its exact thread count and the precise amount of exotic French chantilly lace used in the bustier then I better have a fucking place to go for that information. Read article>>

Uma Thurman and her financier bro Arpad Busson had a baby girl. Her husband also has two kids with Elle McPhereson so we imagine their extended family portraits will only be described as tall. No word on the baby's name in this article but we have to wonder, let's say she had aborted it, would she have named it Bill? Read article>>

This article highlights the scandalous sexual shit that goes down in the Olympic village. Based on this it pretty much sounds like other than the actual Olympic competitions everyone is pretty much drunk and fucking 24/7, so basically it's just like The Real World with a more athletic and diverse group. The article goes on to say that "Olympians are adventurers. They look for a challenge, like having sex with someone who doesn't speak their language." We think Summer Sanders (of Figure It Out fame) put it best: what happens in the village stays in the village. Read article>>

Katie and Suri got in an accident with a garbage truck. No one was hurt and the car wasn't really dented that badly but as naturally suspicious people we can only assume this was some sort of warning sign from the church who must not be named. Read article>>

Above you can see what Lady Gaga has been doing in the off-season, and that is creating a fragrance line excuse to have little men climb all over her in ways they otherwise wouldn't.




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