Real World Roundup: I Kissed a Douche and I Liked It

By The Betches


Apparently just being associated with members of The Hills makes you more douchey. Stephanie Pratt's boyfriend Julien Chabbott ran over an NYPD officer's foot with his Ferrari to avoid getting a parking ticket outside the Mercer Hotel. It's like, if you can afford a fucking ferrari you can afford what is at most a $150 parking ticket, asshole. There's no reason to be assaulting officers no matter how quickly you're trying to get Stephanie home so she can finish designing her latest handbag. We bet Steph wishes she were wearing a chicer hairdo than this weird ass bun. Read article >> 

Many schools around the country are increasing public school from 180 to 200 days. I guess if you're in public school you need all the help you can get. But what kind of losery kids are going to agree to this shit. I would imagine this would produce a revolt on par of the True Blood Vampire Revolution of 2012 in my elementary school. Take away my August vaca to learn fractions? Are you fucking kidding me? In the words of Regina George, some of us shouldn't have to participate in this school extensions because some of us are just victims here. Read Article >>

FOX news is upset that US gymnasts aren't sporting stars and stripes on their uniforms and instead, Olympic gold medal-winning gymnast Gabby Douglas was wearing a pink leotard. Jesus FOX, you'd think the girl was wearing a confederate flag around her body. Gab didn't wear a stars and stripes uniform because she probably wants to get laid and horizontal stripes and stars are far from flattering. Fucking duh. Read article >>

Katy Perry and John Mayer are supposedly dating, a rumor pumped up by the fact that they're seen here in a car together. Interesting couple as I think they're both fucking crazy. We thought John only dated blondes but I guess he'll make an exception for this girl with blue hair. She's not quite as hot as Jennifer Aniston, but I guess Johnny's not doing so well now that Tay Swift revealed what a douche he is coupled with his recent weight gain. Read article >>




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