Real World Roundup: Karl Lagerfeld Calls Pippa Middleton a Butterface

By The Betches

Apparently some Chinese and Indonesian Olympic badminton players were disqualified for throwing aka purposely losing in the Olympic badminton event. Okay so our first question is, who the fuck knew that badminton was an Olympic sport? Secondly, what kind of fucking losers would get a rush out of actually betting on Olympic badminton. I imagine the badminton better as the NASCAR better's lame nicegirl cousin. Seems like when the Chinese aren't trying to sneak 11 year-old boys into gymnastics competitions, they have their eyes on throwing a different sport. Touche for trying to get out of doing #36 work, China. Read article >>

Karl Lagerfeld is up to his betchy, #122 inappropriate antics again. Post calling Adele fat (shockingly insightful) earlier this year, Karl showed that he really just doesn't give a shit about being #24 insensitive and took on some more Brits this week in the press. He said that he doesn't like former Betch of the Week Pippa Middleton's face and that she should only show her back. He also said he admired Victoria Beckham's look because she has a sick body after four kids and he and Vic are kindred spirits because "they have the same eating habits." Talk about a queer who isn't afraid to say whatever the fuck he wants and not give a shit which Brits he pisses off. While we think Pippa's face isn't so bad we admire Karl's ability to tell it like he sees it even if he is the biggest douche to walk the planet. Read article >>

MTV Video Music Awards announced a new award they'll be giving out called the Best Electronic Dance Video Category. It's a great day for #58 house music. We have to say that the music videos for house music definitely seem like a lot more work than the actual act of DJing so an award for a video well done seems fitting. If nothing else it seems like a great way to snag your BFF Molly an invite to the VMAs. Read article >>

For when #130 driving like a fucking idiot gets too difficult we introduce to you....walking like a fucking idiot. CBS news highlights Otherwise known as "distracted walking", walking like a fucking idiot involves texting or talking on your cell phone and not paying attention to the road. The article reports that "A woman texting while she walked through in a suburban Philadelphia shopping mall this year tumbled into a large fountain directly in front of her. Security camera video of the incident went viral, generating millions of hits." Of course it did. This sounds fucking hysterical. Why would you want to ban that kind of entertainment? But really, texting while walking is a necessity. Walking alone is like, really boring and like any kind of important person, we need to find out tonight's pregame plans like, now. A government that bans texting while walking is a government that bans life. Read article >>




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