Real World Roundup: Katie Couric Talks Shit

By The Betches

Katie Couric is being really mean to Kate Middleton saying she should "eat more because she's so thin." Woah woah woah Katie Couric, take a step back for a second and stop being so jealous. Kate looks amazing and you'd lose some weight too if you had to deal with the stresses of palace life, like having to vaca like, ALL the time and be photographed in expensive pantsuits. The life of a princess isn't as easy as your little 'Good Morning America' which like, I don't know anyone who even wakes up early enough to watch. To this Kate is set to release a statement to Katie saying "it's not my fault I'm so popular and that everyone is so jealous of me. You can go shave your back now." Read article >>

The Godmother of cocaine, appropriately named Girselda Blanco was shot and killed in Colombia on Sunday. She  was one of the biggest drug traffickers in the western hemisphere complete with a Blow meets Savages story of killing at least one of her three husbands, multiple orders to kill rando coke dealers in the US, and like, a LOT of drugs. We can't wait for this to be turned into a movie. Although her picture makes her seem pretty ugly, we're sure Penelope Cruz is already practicing her Colombian accent getting ready to play BSCB Blanco. Or will it be Salma Hayek? America Ferrera? Selena Gomez? Whatevs, we can't wait. Read article >>

Prince Harry made out with a 40 year old in Las Vegas. Ew, gross! Read article >>

The AARP released its latest rendition of Call Me, Maybe to get you to call your grandparents on September 9, national grandparents day. Um, hello did they just make that up? That's a Sunday and I'm going to be far too hungover. JK, I always call my grandma. How else am I supposed to make sure I still get my check for $20 every year for my birthday? So check out this video if you want to see a bunch of old people dancing to call me, maybe or if like, your own grandparents are already dead or something. Read article >>




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