Real World Roundup: These Kids Beliebe That Cutting Themselves Is The Answer

By The Betches

January 9, 2013

Some crazy Beliebers are getting really carried away with themselves this week...and every week but especially this week. They're apparently so upset about the photos of Bieber smoking a blunt that they've started a campaign called "Cutting for Bieber" whereby young tweens cut themselves using razor blades, rusty knives, and things of the like, so that Justin realizes how much he is hurting himself and others by smoking the gang. ...OMFG where do we even start with these people. I think we'll start (and end) with the fact that weed is blatantly becoming legal in America and we (and Justin) clearly have no problem with that, so if all these weed-haters want to slice their arteries open before they get a chance to vote against it, we definitely wouldn't cry about it. We might take a hit to help us chill out however. Read article>>

This article says that if you're too well behaved (read: a nicegirl) at work, there's actually a big chance you could get fired for being too nice, passive, and boring. On the other hand, this article actually encourages using curse words at work because it shows you're passionate and give a fuck. I mean, this is obviously something we've always known as we've never held back when it comes to words such as fuck/shit/bitch/etc, and just look how successful we are. What more proof do you need? Read article>>

In a hilarious story that we would probably find really sad if we were poor, some bro left the above note at a restaurant in place of a tip. Our favorite part is the passive aggressive "I wish it didn't have to be this way for both of us" at the end, because you just know this guy is a huge cheap douchebag. Props on effectively conveying sarcasm on paper though bro, my own friends hardly catch when I'm being sarcastic via text. Anyway it definitely cost him at least $25 to print those cards (possibly more, anyone who's seen Patrick Bateman's business card knows that a quality creme card stock runs steep) so he could bring them around to restaurants with him and insult poor people. Ah, a day in the life. Read article>>

This wholesome mother has decided to give her 13-year-old son an iphone for Christmas, but as average people who aren't betches might say, nothing in life is free. This particular iphone came not just with a retina screen and panoramic camera capabilities, but with a list of 18 rules from his mom restricting his usage. You can see some of them above, the rest in the article. I mean, if my mom ever told me my phone came with a list of limitations I'd simply take it upon myself to change her own iphone password while she was off typing up this stupid list and refuse to tell her the new password until she admitted she was acting like a fucking loser who has no understanding of our generation. Two can play at this game. Read article>>








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