January 12, 2015
Shay Mitchell, the Prettiest Little Liar and a person who has, like, AT LEAST 2-3 distinctly different facial expressions, is on the cover of Maxim this month. Which, I know, right? I didn’t even know Maxim was still a thing! I couldn’t find a copy of the issue, either because it’s sold out or my CVS doesn’t carry Maxim. Either way, I’m pretty sure I’m the first person to actively seek out an issue of that magazine since 2006.
In the mean time, Shay posted a video to instagram, presumably from the cover shoot. She has… some things to say:
“I am a woman who wants to travel to as many different places as I can, meet as many different people, experience as many different cultures, try out as many different foods while wearing a great pair of heels.”
Those are lofty goals! Shay Mitchell wants to… go places! Eat stuff! Not be barefoot! Granted, it’s not easy to describe yourself in like 15 seconds, but she does so like the worst kind of boilerplate online dating profile. Of course, none of that matters, because I’d sell my entire family into slavery if it meant I could spend 15 minutes in the same zip code as Shay Mitchell.
Stars - they’re just like us (hungry, that is).