June 18, 2015
The US Government decided to put a woman on the $10 bill by 2020, mostly so that feminists would stop bitching about it. The government is letting America choose, so this is the most important election of 2015. What regulation hottie are we going to put on the bill used for Starbucks and valet parking? The Treasury started #TheNew10 for suggestions, whoever this betch will officially get to say "Silence fives a ten is speaking."
Apparently the top contenders are Harriet Tubman, Eleanor Roosevelt, and Rosa Parks, who are all pretty famous for saying "Nah" to racism and sexism. Some are saying Hillary Clinton might abolish the use of the $10 bill if she's not chosen, and Beyonce won't release an album until she gets her own currency.
Whoever it is will replace the current $10 homie, Alexander Hamilton aka the guy who invented the First Bank of the United States aka he created finance summer internships. He also started the Federalist Party and did a lot of George Washington's bitch work. So like sucks to suck Alex H, but there's a new HBIC.
If betches carried cash, this would be a pretty BFD..