July 1, 2013
This story is actually gold. A 20 year-old girl named Elizabeth Daly and a couple of her friends at the University of Virginia were getting back into their car after buying some #74 bottled water, cookie dough, and ice cream for their sorority's fundraiser when a few men in nondescript outfits pulled a gun on them, jumped on the hood of the car, and yelled to not move. So naturally, Elizabeth started driving away as fast as possible. Turns out these guys were not the bros from Tower Heist, but instead Alcohol Beverage Control officers who thought the bottles of water were cans of beer.
Now, there had to been at least a few weeks every year in college when people were like ABC's in town, can't go to the bars tonight. But I just thought this just meant I was in danger of getting a drinking ticket not getting the LIVING shit scared out of me. Really guys, was it necessary to JUMP ON THE HOOD of her car? And the gun? Really? Did you also think that the cookie dough and ice cream were explosives? Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Nuclear Bomb. Now that's a flavor I would try.
But the best part of the story is that before the incident, she had just attended a "Take Back the Night," vigil on campus, where women talked about personal incidents of sexual assault. I feel so bad for this girl that I can't contain my laughter.
And then on top of that she ended up getting arrested and spending a night in jail with not one but three felonies, including assaulting a police officer. I mean, here's this nice young girl who wants to kick back with some ice cream and...water....after hearing about the woes of battered women and ends up getting the emotional shit beaten out of her by the POLICE. Unless one of her felonies was buying poor water, I'm going out today in my Free Elizabeth tee.