January 12, 2016
I hooked up with a guy on my hall and he will not leave me alone. He comes by late night all time, snaps me daily, always asking to hang out - like will not take a hint it was a one time thing. He lives 3 doors down, what am I going to do? He is so nice, I don’t want to hurt his feeling but we’re talking stage 5 clinger here. This is an emergency - help me betches.
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Dear Room 3B,
Before I ask you if you’ve ever heard of the phrase “don’t shit where you eat” I’ll ask where you are on the hotness scale compared to him. Sounds like you are winning in that department and have more options than him, take advantage of that and bring around another dude. It’s the harshest way to deal, but nothing says take a hint like “this other guy’s penis was just in me.”
Since you seem to be worried about his feelings (what’s that like?) then go to the old standby of just being honest. It’ll be awkward but obviously ignoring him is not working, so go next level. Next time he stops by, take a few shots of courage and give him the “Mark, I had fun with you that night but I don’t think it’s a good idea to do again because we live in the same dorm.” Blame it on the dorm, even though we all know if he was a 6 incher, you’d be back in the bunk as we speak.