July 13, 2015
Although it too is probs more fun on molly, strobing doesn’t have anything to do with your Friday nights at LGHT (or whatever other weird clubs without vowels you prefer). It’s actually just another makeup trend disguised with enigmatic wording to make you feel inferior/remind you that you don’t know how to put colors on your face in the right way. Anyway, good thing you have us because according to Kim Kardashian's MUA, strobing is totally the new thing and if you’re not doing it then you’re on the fast track to becoming a.) more irrelevant than Kim's selfie book b.) ugly. So because we don’t want those things for you, here’s how to strobe like a betch.
Pretend that you are about to highlight and contour, but lose the part where you're accidentally in blackface for a quick minute, pre-blend. In other words, don’t contour.
Then, highlight. If you are confused as to where, think about where light hits your face. If you are still confused (seriously?) here’s a guide: forehead, cheekbones, under the brow bone, bridge of the nose, cupid’s bow, chin. It’s honestly not that hard.
Feel like an idiot because you just learned that strobing is literally just highlighting.
Feel like an idiot again when you realize that J.Lo has actually been doing this shit since 1997.
Feel chic because you just mastered it and probably look almost half as good as J.Lo did with this unfortunate hat on.
Feel blessed because hopefully this means that people will stop turning their faces into other people’s faces (instagram search the hashtag #contour only if you are a masochist)..